One Month Free from Treatment

At this point since I have finished treatment, and cancer is potentially behind me. I plan on keeping this blog updated with my recovery from treatment. Mainly of my arm(which does have a long way to go), and the general recovery from chemo. My big goal right now is to be ready to go to school in the fall. The question with my arm is whether the cadaver will fuse. If it doesn't, I will have surgery; which will need to be moved up to avoid missing a few weeks of school. I just hope my next tests show a lot of improvement.

My last day of treatment was March 21st. Now that I'm about one month free from chemo; here are my thoughts:

It's going to take a while to heal. During the last three cycles I often imagined what recovery would be like. At first I thought it would be a lot like it was when I had my break before surgery. In that one month break I recovered pretty well, and felt really well by the end of it. I mean,  I felt so good that I was jogging on the treadmill during that break. But as I got through these last three cycles I began to doubt that idea. Mainly because the side effects were much more severe during this period. I quickly began to realize that my body was going to get broken down like never before. And now that I'm one month out, I can verify that this was correct. 

At this point the side effects that I have are the side effects that I have dealt with since the beginning. The more acute things like mouth-sores, reflux, bone pain, and nausea are gone. The main side effects that I have right now are listed below.

-Hair loss. I just started noticing a little bit of stubble on the top of my head. Other than that the entirety of my body is bald with the exception of a few eyebrow hairs, and my very patchy lower legs. The extreme hair loss from my chemo regimen is definitely real. I lost about 95% of my hair.

-Fatigue. My hemoglobin was low on my last test, but I can't blame it all on that. Let's face it I'm very out of shape. This is the most out of shape I will probably ever be in my life. One weird thing to note is that throughout my chemo treatment I actually gained weight. I gained about 5 lbs. But I did lose a lot of muscle. I especially notice it in my legs. My lower leg is basically all bone. There isn't much muscle there anymore, and I also have stretch marks on my hips. The other day I wanted to see how  high I could jump, and it was pretty sad. I barely got net, and almost hurt myself on the landing. My shins couldn't take the impact at all, forcing me to collapse when I came down. I won't be trying that again for a while. Once it starts getting consistently nice outside I will start walking. 

-Neuropathy. My fingertips are still numb. I'm not sure if it has improved at all in this time off. It's especially bad when I wake up in the morning, or when I go out in the cold. To add to this I also have very brittle fingernails. I have lots of ridges on them. Keeping them as short as possible is key right now.

These things will improve. The question is....how long?, and that's what I'll be documenting along the way. With all that I've been through, these symptoms that I still have are no big deal to me. I feel so blessed everyday to be given this second chance at life, and that overshadows how I feel physically.

I almost forgot to mention this. I'm getting my port out today. I can't wait to get this thing out. It did it's job really well, but if I'm not using it, then I gotta lose it. I considered keeping it in for three months, but I feel like keeping it in is like telling the cancer that, "I'm ready for another game." And I don't want that at all. I'm retired, and I hope that I don't ever have to come out of retirement.

Lastly, keep my friend Greg Hamilton in your prayers as he continues to battle sarcoma. Also keep all of the other people battling sarcoma in your prayers as well. If you have the chance please like this page on Facebook to support him. https://www.facebook.com/chemocozy

Have a happy Easter!

edit: I just missed out on posting this before my surgery today. The port removal went well. I'm really tired right now, but not too nauseous.

Scans are Clear!

I had a lot of good news today. At my oncology appointment I heard the news I have been waiting for, for so long...my scans are clear, meaning there is no evidence of the cancer in my body right now. My bone scan, and CT scan results were very boring which is good. The reason why I needed more images of my hip on the bone scan was because of my bone graft. It was creating a false red-flag, and so was my arm. Other than those two areas, there was nothing exciting about the bone scan test. The CT scan only showed the same nodule from before. It didn't change in size which means that it doesn't have anything to do with my cancer, and is nothing to worry about.

My blood-work was pretty good, but I'm still anemic which explains why I'm still tired. I'm not going to take my daily supplement pills this week(Magnesium, and Potassium), and if my blood results are fine checking for those two supplements I will be done with those pills. That'll be really great because I always hated taking those pills. The last piece of really good news for me was that I'm getting my port out. It might be next week or the week after. It depends because I'm going to be busy next week.

My appointment with my surgeon also went well. The results were pretty much what we expected. There is new bone growth on both ends of my humerus, but it has a long way to go before it closes the bridge with my cadaver bone in there. I wish I had a picture of the x-ray to show you, but there are gaps on both ends of the cadaver where it meets the ends of my own humerus. This is a start though which is good. My arm is a little bit stronger, and the flexibility is getting there. There is one movement that I struggle with, but everything else really impresses her. I'm also starting to get some muscle tone on my arm back which surprised her considering all of the chemo I was receiving. I'm still limited on weight to 8 lbs, but I can play basketball as long as I avoid anything that might cause me to fall. Which means I'm just limited to shooting around, but I'll take it. At this point were hoping that my humerus fuses with the cadaver by my next appointment in two months. If it doesn't then I might have to have another surgery to help it fuse. Now that I'm finished with treatment, new bone growth will come a lot easier so hopefully it works.

Thank you everyone for your prayers. I am a living example of the power of prayer, and I couldn't be more grateful.

Anxious

I forgot to add this in my last post, but I get my scan results on Thursday April 10th. I also have an appointment with my surgeon that day. In my last post I explained that I'm not going to read my results when they become available online. They just became available this morning. I'm standing by what I said, and I will not check them. This last week has been really stressful for me, but I've gotten through it. During the day I try to keep as busy as possible. I do anything to keep my mind off of things like play video games, watch TV, computer work etc.

Adding on my previous post. What makes post treatment such a scary thing for me is the lack of control that I feel. When I was receiving treatment I monitored side effects, and managed them accordingly. I handled the treatment well, and only got off schedule at the end. Having a lot of delays can impact the effectiveness of the chemo. When it comes down to it, the only control I really had with beating this cancer was just that; managing side effects, and making sure my body was ready for the next dose of chemicals. While what I just mentioned isn't really going to matter that much, it does certainly help. Most of the factors that go into beating this are completely out of my control. But now that I'm (hopefully) finished with treatment, the little bit of control that I had is now gone.

The scans themselves weren't too bad last week. I've gotten used to them by now. I had an X-ray of my arm, CT of my chest, and Bone scan. The bone scan was 45 minutes long. It would have been 30 minutes, but they had to rerun some tests which I don't know what to make of. After the normal 30 minute scan finished the technician consulted a doctor over the phone, but I don't know if it was my oncologist. The doctor wanted more pictures of my pelvis, and chest. They did 10 minutes on my pelvis, and had me at a different angle from the first time, but the chest was the same as it was during the test. I don't like that they spent so much time looking at my pelvis since it wasn't that long during the 30 minute scan originally. I hope there's nothing there. I was going to ask the technician why I was getting more pictures, but I was too afraid to ask. I have no pain in those places. The only discomfort I have is in my back, but I think that's from poor posture using the computer. The CT scan was quick, and easy like last time.

On Thursday a lot of my lingering questions will be answered with these tests. Like that lung nodule on the scan in November. They said its nothing to worry about, but that they would keep an eye on it. A lot of people have them, but as I have come to learn from my cancer diagnosis: nothing surprises me anymore. I will have closure on that. I haven't mentioned my back to anyone yet, but I have had a dull ache in the center of my back for about a month now. This is an example of what I mentioned in my last post. Anytime I have some lingering pain I'm going to be freaking out. I doubt it's anything, but again nothing would surprise me. I'll also find out the status of the healing in my arm on Thursday. It'll probably be the same news as last appointment because of the chemo preventing me from healing.

I think what makes me most anxious about Thursday is the clashing sides of the news I could hear then are. It could be the worst news I hear since my diagnosis on one end of the spectrum. It could also be the best news I hear since I began this journey; the news we've all been waiting for. There really isn't anything in between. If there is any sign of the cancer no matter the size it's really bad news for me, but if it's gone then it's all good. If its gone I will finally feel ready to begin my next journey in returning back to "normal life."One thing I do have on my side is that the weather is supposed to be great on Thursday. Good weather has been a good omen for me since the beginning. Yes, I'm that superstitious. I plan on wearing all of lucky clothes on Thursday. Anything to improve my odds(at least in my mind).

From my first day

Over the last two week I have finally gotten back to work on getting my arm better. I pushed it too hard the first few days though. I was doing the stretching three times a day(which is what I should be doing), and strength work once a day. That was too much because it made things worse forcing me to take a few days off. Now I'm taking special care to heat my whole arm before(which I was doing), and also ice my arm afterwards. I also removed the strength work, and reduced the stretching to twice a day for now. What really frustrates me about my arm is my wrist irritation. I have a vein in there that has been bothering me for a while now. If I don't heat my elbow, and wrist really well I can't extend my elbow all the way without it straining that vein. It's really annoying. I hope all the cancer is gone, and I'm finished with treatment so things like this could heal already. Remember when I blew that vein on my first day of treatment? It still didn't heal yet. It got better, and visibly looks healed but it's still sore.

I'll keep you guys posted about my results. I'll try to get them on here on Thursday, but if it's too late I'll have it on here on Friday for sure.

Keep me in your prayers on Thursday as I receive the results of my tests, along with all of the other people going through the same thing I'm going through now.